Spiritual growth is a prerequisite for any person that must live a fulfilled life. The same way parents are excited when they see their children grow from one level of maturity to another is the same way God is pleased at our spiritual growth and displeased with stunted growth. The same way a new born baby can do very little for himself not to talk of others is the same way a Christian that just received the life of Christ can do little for himself not to talk of others. God expresses his desire for spiritual growth in the bible as found in 1 Peter 2:2 when He says "As new born babies, desire the sincere milk of the Word that ye may grow thereby." He was talking to a group of believers that have received the life of Christ not long ago. He wanted them to desire the sincere milk of the Word so that they grow from one level of maturity to another. However true this is, spiritual growth is a personal responsibility. It is not something that someone can do for you; it is something that you must do consciously. You can help in the growth process of your girlfriend but the onus still lies on her to take responsibility. It is like somebody teaching you how to pray. At the end of the day, you still will have to do the prayer yourself.
Growing up spiritually with your girlfriend has to do with relationships and spiritual growth. The relationships that we keep can either help or mar our spiritual growth. This is why we must be intentional about the relationships
we keep. It all starts with making a choice of a girlfriend. I am of the opinion that when two young people are not ready for marriage, they should forget about going into any kind of intimate relationship because there are a whole lot of things involved. But two people of opposite sex can be friends. Before I got married, I had friends of the opposite sex and even after wedding; I still have friends of the opposite sex. So, there is absolutely nothing wrong with that but we must be intentional about it and both parties should set boundaries and know their limits from the beginning of such relationship.
When making a choice of a girlfriend, you must ask yourself some questions: Why am I going into this relationship? How can I help this person become a better person? Can this person help me become a better person? I am not saying that you should be looking out for what people can do for you before you will make them your friends, NO! I am talking of someone that you can call your friend. Before I got married to my wife, we were first of all friends and we are still friends and I can say we both helped each other grow spiritually and we still do. We were not even living in the same state and we only saw ourselves four times before we got married but we shared the Word of God together almost daily. If my wife reads the Bible, she would share with me what she read and how she understood what she had read and I do the same thing too. So, one of the ways you can grow spiritually with your girlfriend is by studying the Word of God together. The Word of God is our source of nourishment. The same way we eat good food in the physical to stay healthy and strong is the same way we study the Word of God for spiritual growth. The Word of God is food for the spirit.
Another way to grow spiritually with your girlfriend is by praying together. I and my fiancee then had a day in the week that we set aside for fasting and prayers before we got
married despite the fact we were far apart. Each week, we had a focus for our prayers and fasting. After we got engaged, we started praying for our unborn kids, business, family etc. so, another way you can grow spiritually with your boyfriend/girlfriend is by spending time in prayer together. Your focus on prayer of course should depend on the level of friendship. Another way you can grow spiritually with your girlfriend is by reading books especially Christian literature together. If you read a book that changed you, do not fail to share with your girlfriend. I remember before I and my wife got married, we used to talk about books that we read. The first day I met with my wife, I went with some books. Encourage your girlfriend to read. Read books together and share your opinions chapter by chapter about the book you have read. If you have a girlfriend that is always talking about sex, wild parties, having fun etc. you need to help her see things from a different perspective. It will not help their spiritual growth. When you are together with your girlfriend, you need to maximize those moments by talking about God and His Kingdom, talk about how you are going to impact the world with the life of Christ in you, talk about your dreams and aspirations, talk about personal experiences or encounters you have had with God, talk about your passion and the things that drive you etc.
These are meaningful discussions which friends that desire spiritual growth should engage in. If you have someone around you posing to be a friend and you want to know if this person can help you grow spiritually, consciously bring up these types of discussion and check the person's response. If the person is going to be of help, she will be interested in hanging out with you but if not, the person will leave quietly. The Word of God tells us that evil communication corrupts good manners. You need to consciously look out for your girlfriend to grow spiritually.